


nothing but a ghost in my head

by dryadfiona



Category: Tomb Raider & Related Fandoms, Tomb Raider (Video Games)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Possession, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-05-09
Packaged: 2020-02-28 22:44:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18765793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dryadfiona/pseuds/dryadfiona
Summary: Lara comes home and tells Sam about Paititi. Sam and Himiko fight for control.





	nothing but a ghost in my head

**Author's Note:**

> i haven't read the comics so i can't guarantee this is canon compliant but i did try, except for when i ignored the stuff i don't care about

"I thought I was going to die," Lara says, looking at Sam with a small, sad smile.

Sam doesn't respond. Himiko, of course, does, trying to sound as nice as she can, saying, "Oh, Lara."

Lara's face twitches. "Don't do that."

Himiko twists Sam's face into a mask of confusion, but she'd been dormant for so long. She's still bad at emoting. "What do you mean?"

"Don't."

Sam doesn't know how she feels about Lara's voice there. She doesn't blame her for anything she did on Yamatai or in Kitezh or Paititi--but. It's strange. She remembers Lara as a wallflower, too shy to ask her to dance until they'd lived together for more than a year. Admittedly, a wallflower with  _amazing_ arms. Lara wasn't the type of person whose voice would drop into a snarl. It's not a threat, exactly, but the way Lara speaks, Sam knows that if Himiko wasn't possessing Sam, Lara would have an axe in her skull.

Himiko, recognizing her defeat, sits back against the wall of the cell and smiles. Her version of a smile, anyway. It's both too small and too wide, distinctly inhuman. Whenever Sam catches a glimpse of it in the mirror outside the cell, she flinches (internally).

Sam, if she's being honest, doesn't know why Lara still visits her. She hasn't had control of her body for longer than ten minutes in a long, long time. She  _tries,_ she tries so hard she forces their-- _her_ body unconscious with the mental effort of it, but Himiko's power is considerable, and Sam is so, so tired.

Lara's face goes from a grimace to a soft smile, the same face she had when Sam brought her food during finals or when Sam finally gave up and asked  _her_ to dance because damn, that girl really didn't pick up on the whole  _mutual_ pining thing.

"As I was saying, I thought I was going to die," Lara says. "I thought I had to. The world was going to end." Her eyes a wide, still a little disbelieving. "Which."

Sam wants to say something. She wants to say  _anything,_ calling her girlfriend an idiot or calling her lovely or calling her a shitheaded bastard, even, if it was her words speaking.

"Is a little strange," Lara finishes after too many beats of silence. "But. I didn't, as you can see." She does jazz hands, and Sam laughs.

Wait. Hold on.

Sam  _laughed._

Himiko digs her fingers into her arm, and what little control Sam had accidentally taken is gone as the body lets out an involuntary hiss of pain.

Lara takes the smallest step towards the cell, in the confusion, and Himiko lunges forward.

It's only due to her truly incredible reflexes that Lara manages to avoid being grabbed. Sam doesn't know what would happen if Himiko managed to grab her. Sam's not the strongest person in the world, even with a witch possessing her, but it's difficult to imagine Lara doing anything to hurt Sam, even if it meant her own life.

"One day," Lara says, and her voice has dropped into something worse than anger. "I am going to find a way to save you, Sam. And I am going to tear Himiko apart limb by limb."

Sam knows she's serious. Himiko knows she's serious--Sam can tell from the slight twist in her stomach. Their face smiles, half an uneasy fear response from a queen ageless long enough that the idea of death is terrifying, half relief and fierce pride and love and love and love.

"Sam," Lara says. "I love you."

Sam does all she can to move any part of her body to respond. She thinks she might've gotten one of her fingers to twitch, but it might've been a shiver--the cell is cold. Sam hates the cold, always has, but when the room's too warm Himiko rages at it. Funny, for a Sun Queen.

She thinks that with all the contempt she can muster. Himiko doesn't respond, too focused on the person who defeated her.

Himiko's a little obsessed with Lara. It's not anything romantic, thank God, that would've been the only thing to make this situation  _worse_ , but Himiko thinks about Lara almost as much as Sam thinks about Lara.

Sam thinks about holding her hand again. Himiko thinks about drowning her in a hurricane.

Lara studies them intensely. Her face drops a bit when she can't see a response from Sam, and Sam screams and rages and claws at the inside of her skull. It gives her a headache worse than when Himiko does it, but she has to do  _something_ , she misses her she misses her she misses her.

"Quiet," Himiko says coldly.

"Don't tell me--"

"Not you." Lara nearly flinches when Himiko-in-Sam turns to stare at her, and Sam can only imagine what she would do if she saw someone else looking at her through Lara's eyes.

"Sam?" Lara asks, hopefully, maintaining eye contact.

Sam tries again to do something, say anything, and Lara looks so goddamn hopeful that Sam actually manages it.

She takes a breath like she's coming up for air, and says, "Lara."

Her voice isn't hoarse, but her intonation is a little strange--she doesn't remember the last time she talked. She thinks it was a few months ago. Before Lara left for her latest adventure, she knows. 

"Sam." Lara rushes towards the bars, and Sam grips her girlfriend's hand.

"I love you, Lara," Sam says. "I love you so much. You mean the world to me."

"You are the world to me," Lara says, earnest as anything. "I'm going to save you."

"I know," Sam says, and she doesn't dare kiss her in case Himiko manages to take control back then and there. She squeezes her hand instead. "You always do."

Lara smiles, a little bitter, a little sweet. "I have to go again soon, Sam."

"It's okay," Sam says. Her voice is quieter now, and she knows she doesn't have much time left. "You--you should step back."

Lara squeezes her hand, hard enough to bruise, and steps back from the cell.

Himiko lunges forward to try and grab Lara, but she misses.

She always does.

"I love you, Sam," Lara says, and the grin on her face is breath-taking. "We'll talk again soon."

Sam isn't able to respond at all, but she's content.

The bruise on her hand is going to suck. But it'll be a reminder, something for Himiko to hate and Sam to poke at and smile.

Lara'll save her. She always does.


End file.
